Randy

  this year taught me one of the most valuable lessons of my life: it’s okay to let go. let go of trying to make everyone understand me. let go of the need to prove my worth to those who can’t see it. I’ve learned that people will always have their opinions, and that’s alright. I’m not here to live up to someone else’s expectations—I’m here to live my own. at the end of the day, I’m simply human. I have my flaws, and I don’t need to be anyone’s role model to feel worthy. I don’t need to pretend my cracks and scars don’t exist. I’ve stopped tolerating things I’m not okay with. I’ve spoken up when things went wrong, but I’ve also learned when to stay silent. I’ve realized I don’t have to sacrifice my happiness to please anyone. this year, I decided to put myself first. 2024 was about fighting small battles every day—getting out of bed each morning when the weight of the world tempted me to stay down, showing up when I felt like hiding away, taking a deep breath before checking emails...

I think I’ve faced many obstacles and put up with more than I could handle, but at the end of the day I’ve grown so much as a person. My 2021 was full of blessings, challenges, opportunities, lessons, and growth. I took TOEFL ITP test; I got the acceptance to continue my studies; I was able to spend Eid with my loved ones; I got my first and second dose of Covid-19 vaccine; and I made many new friends. All of those things happened in just a year! My highlight of 2021 would be me starting my studies in a one-year profession program, as well as one-semester pre-master program both in August, at two different universities (all classes are conducted virtually). I’ve also graduated with my second bachelor’s degree in November! Alhamdulillah. 2021 was also full of stressful moments, because sometimes I was experiencing burnout at work and I was struggling with university’s assignments. Despite everything, I’m so grateful for all the things that happened to me and all that I did in 2021. I ho...

Sometimes, I’m so focused on what I need to do that I often forget to appreciate what I’ve accomplished. Too often I take small steps towards my goal without joyfully embracing the experience of getting there. So I would like to take a moment to reflect on how far I have come, not just how much further I have to go. Looking back, I degraded myself so much. I think I put too much absurd expectations on myself. But for the past few years, I could get the opportunity to look deeper into myself. I’ve been learning to be honest with my feelings, appreciate the small things in life, accept when things don’t go to plan, and let go of things I can’t control. I should be proud of myself for being able to come this far. For me, personal growth is something to work on but also a goal to work for. I think it’s easy for me to lose sight of the small progress I’m making in life. So I think it’s important to recognize that all this time I’m always making efforts to move forward and keep going. Someti...

The pandemic really took away the memories we could have made. In 2020, I didn’t come home for almost a year because of the pandemic, but when I do, the moment was for the funeral of my dad. I know, it sucks. I just couldn’t imagine my mom and my sister had to go through everything and I wasn’t even there with them. In case you’re wondering, I have two fathers and I’m talking about my step father here. He passed away in December 2020. But no, it wasn’t because of the coronavirus because he was already sick even before the pandemic. Back then, he had to do the hemodialysis twice a week. He basically went back & forth to the hospital and for several times, he was hospitalized too. But he’s in a good place now. 2020 was one hell of a year, and undoubtedly one of the most challenging years for everyone. For some people, maybe 2021 is even more challenging. We’re already in the second half of 2021, but sadly the coronavirus situation in Indonesia is just getting worse. As for the vaccin...

I took the photo when my friends and I were on a boat, then we had circled the swamp in the mangrove forest area in northern Jakarta. We headed toward a river, which was not the usual route. When I look at the photo, I come to think of something.  I know this sounds too philosophical, but the photo reminds me about our life in general, where we're basically walking into the future and most of the time we have no idea whether we’re on the right track. From time to time, we’re not sure whether our decisions will bring us to the goals that we want. The uncertainty and the inability to predict the future, is actually what makes us alive to keep going and moving forward. We might be scared or worried because we don’t know what’s going to happen. But at times, we can be very excited about it too. Then I was inspired to write this post to talk about one of my biggest decisions in 2021. This year, I decided to continue my studies. It’s not a master’s degree (not yet), but it’s a profession...

Alhamdulillah, we made it to 2021! Postingan pertama di tahun 2021 ini saya pengin curhat tentang saya yang kuliah S1 lagi padahal sudah punya gelar S1. Akhirnya ada beberapa teman/keluarga yang tanya, “ngapain? kenapa ngga S2 aja?”. Well, it’s gonna be a long answer. That’s why I’m writing this post. But I also dedicate this post for those of you who are still hesitant to go back to college again. So.. Why bother taking another bachelor’s degree instead of master’s degree? Will it be worth it? Although my case would be different from yours, some of my reasons may help you to start considering getting a second bachelor’s degree. I wanted to enjoy my life to enrich knowledge while I am still young.  They said 20s are the critical time in life to focus on learning and improving yourself. 20s are the best time for academic learning and it’s the phase where we can easily absorb in learning new things. 20s are the ideal time to enjoy life, have fun, but also to figure out what...

Sering bersin-bersin secara terus menerus? Tiba-tiba hidung mampet? Mata gatal dan berair? Kulit tangan dan kaki muncul ruam merah? Ini bisa jadi gejala awal alergi. Saya selalu tahu kalau saya punya alergi, tapi tidak pernah tahu apa penyebabnya. Beberapa tahun terakhir, saya selalu mengalami gejala alergi setiap pulang ke Bandung. Jadi selama ini berasumsi kalau saya alergi terhadap cuaca dingin. Tetapi gejalanya tidak pernah separah beberapa bulan yang lalu, padahal saya tidak sedang di Bandung. Jadi kemungkinan bukan karena alergi cuaca dingin. Daripada penasaran, akhirnya saya memutuskan untuk tes alergi. Sejak bulan Maret lalu, saya WFH dan tidak pergi ke kantor sama sekali. Kerja pun tidak selalu full dalam satu minggu. Sisi positifnya saya jadi lebih punya banyak waktu untuk memperhatikan kesehatan dan lebih leluasa untuk pergi mengurus ini itu di hari kerja. Setidaknya dengan melakukan tes alergi saya jadi tidak penasaran lagi kalau saya ini sebenarnya alergi apa saja. Selain ...

It's not easy for me to tell this story because it’s embarrassing. For your information,  sexual  bullying is a type of bullying involving gestures, comments, or actions that are intended to intimidate or offend another person. On the other hand, sexual  harassment is a type of harassment involving unwelcome or inappropriate sexual requests that include verbal or physical harassment.  Sexual  harassment and sexual bullying are basically the same thing.  They are both involving unwanted sexual comments, attention, or physical contact. Here’s the story.. I went to a vocational high school dominated by boys. From hundreds of boys, girls in my academic year are less than twenty. So yes, basically, in my school, if you’re not ‘manly’ enough or if you’re considered weak by a group of people, the possibility for you to get bullied is high. There was this one boy in my school and we are in the same year. He was always around with a group of boys. I used to get teas...

What would be your answer to the question of the title? As for me, I would say, “yes” and “no”. No, it’s not bullshit because I do agree that you can’t always fool people by manipulating them or pretend to be someone that you’re not just to make people like you. Yes, because we all know that in a society we can’t always be who we are and doing what we’re doing, which I think the advice is bullshit. I understand the genuine intention of “be yourself”. The advice of course is great in a few ways. Yes, you have to be confident with yourself, so that people can love you for who you are. However, it’s pretty much impossible in my case. I’m just kind of tired of people telling me to be myself because I know deep in my heart, in a lot of ways I would never be “myself”. Some people might think, “Oh, if they like me, then great. If they don’t, I don’t care”. Well, it’s not wrong. You can’t please everyone and you don’t need validation from anyone to be who you want. The thing is that you can’t ...

I have been going through a quarter-life crisis.. Yes, quarter-life crisis is a real thing! You have no idea that a lot of young individuals are in the middle of their quarter-life crisis right now. This type of personal crisis is most commonly experienced in the period of early 20s up to mid-30s. I’m experiencing it too. I feel like I’m trapped. I’m currently in a constant state of worry. I’m starting to doubt myself, hardly get to sleep and overthink everything. The anxiety and the uncertainty hit me right in the feelings. I feel like I just want to ‘get out’ or run away from certain situations. Sometimes I would also compare my achievements in life with others. I know it’s not healthy. It’s like I never feel satisfied with my life and always craving for more. Comparing myself with others is probably just a way of me telling myself “Hey, you can do better! You have to be better! If they can do it, why can’t you?”. Well, I shouldn’t have done that. I have my limits. ...

During self-quarantine, I have been miserable for weeks worrying about everything, and I think it’s pretty normal for me (or us) to feel this way considering the situation we’re going through right now. I’m so grateful to have some friends who have been helping me through their words or actions. I received so much energy and so much love from them during this tough time. I don’t know when this will end, and no one knows. I’m already at the stage where I can only think about what will happen in the next few days. It’s really like survival. But why do I need to worry since there will always be a possibility for me to find happiness? I need to take a breath and remind myself that I’m blessed to be surrounded by good friends. I will always need them to support me, inspire me, and comfort me like they always do. I miss them a lot.

Untuk kamu di masa lalu, maaf jika aku pernah menyakiti perasaanmu. Maaf jika aku yang dulu terlalu berusaha keras untuk menjadi seseorang yang sebenarnya bukan diriku sendiri. Mengertilah kalau aku yang dulu belum cukup dewasa untuk mengerti bagaimana dunia ini bekerja. Aku bahkan masih belum mengenal diriku sendiri. Terima kasih karena telah menghabiskan masa-masa indah bersamaku. Terima kasih karena sudah mau menjadi temanku di masa lalu untuk melalui semua proses itu, prosesku menjadi aku yang dewasa. Untuk kamu di masa lalu, aku yang sekarang mungkin tidak lagi sama seperti aku di masa lalu. Tapi percayalah aku tetap orang yang sama yang selalu bahagia jika dikelilingi orang-orang baik. Aku senang melakukan hal-hal 'gila' hanya untuk bisa bercanda dan tertawa bersama. Semua orang tentunya mempunyai masa lalu, dan kita tahu masa lalu tidak selalu indah. Tapi yang pasti masa lalu akan selalu meninggalkan kenangan yang seringkali sulit dilupakan. Maybe I'm no longe...

Mungkin banyak yang belum tahu kalau kita bisa berkontribusi untuk memperbaiki terjemahan bahasa Indonesia dengan menjadi volunteer translator di situs-situs yang sangat dekat sekali dengan kita. Dengan menjadi penerjemah, kita bisa belajar bahasa Indonesia sekaligus menambah kosakata bahasa Inggris juga. Zaman sekarang ini rasanya hampir semua orang punya akun Google. Facebook dan Twitter juga merupakan salah satu social media platform yang populer. Artinya kita semua bisa membantu situs-situs tersebut dalam memperbaiki terjemahan bahasa Indonesia menjadi terjemahan yang tepat, sesuai dengan tata bahasa, situasi budaya, dan agar tidak terkesan kaku. Translate Facebook Team Mereka mempunyai misi untuk memungkinkan banyak orang terhubung dalam bahasa yang dipahami semua orang. Saya terhitung baru di Facebook Translation Team, padahal platform ini sudah ada sejak tahun 2008. Untuk bergabung, klik disini: https://facebook.com/TranslateFacebookTeam/ lalu login dengan aku...

(Image: Shutterstock/woocat) I would've never expected nor imagined 2020 to be this way. 2020 is such a rollercoaster year and it's been just 4 months.. Hampir setiap orang di dunia merasakan dampak dari pandemi ini. Banyak rencana di tahun 2020 ini yang terpaksa harus tertunda atau bahkan dibatalkan. Dari segi pekerjaan, ada banyak orang yang terpaksa harus kehilangan pekerjaannya; ada yang harus 'dirumahkan' untuk waktu yang tidak tentu; ada yang masih dianggap 'beruntung' karena dipotong gajinya; ada pula yang lebih beruntung karena masih bisa mendapatkan gajinya secara utuh. The uncertainty caused by this pandemic really affecting everyone. Pekerjaan saya juga terdampak. Meskipun sulit, saya harus tetap bersyukur karena setidaknya saya masih punya pekerjaan dan bisa kerja dari rumah. Tidak semua orang punya privilege itu dan tidak semua jenis pekerjaan bisa bekerja dengan sistem WFH (Work From Home) dan bisa bekerja di belakang komputer/laptop. Sebagia...

I know it’s too late to write this post, but who cares? Tulisan ini hanyalah sebuah curahan hati saya selama tahun 2019. Highlight tahun ini buat saya tentu saja menjadi pengurus inti selama setahun penuh di SAM. Banyak ups dan downs yang saya dan 4 pengurus lain rasakan. Saya senang karena bisa melihat dari dekat masih banyak sekali orang baik yang mau ikut terlibat untuk memperjuangkan hak-hak anak. We started out in a doubt, and I guess we all felt the same back then, but eventually we did it. Saya banyak belajar dari mereka ber-4. Banyak senyuman, harapan, dan juga pengalaman yang berharga yang saya dapatkan selama tahun 2019 bareng mereka. Let me recap what happened in 2019.. Bulan Maret 2019 kemarin, we finally have MRT in town! I was so excited and I think it’s something to celebrate after waiting for decades. Beberapa hari setelah pertama kali MRT Jakarta beroperasi, saya ikut Trial Run gratis. Saya pernah naik MRT di Singapore, Bangkok, dan Tokyo, dan menuru...